Humor Essays
"The Lizard Queen" in Defenestration Magazine
"First Kiss" in Issue II of Great Ape Journal
"Afraid of the Arch and Terrified by the Truss: My Fear of Bridges" in The Museum of Americana
"Why I love the Grocery Store" in Pif Magazine
"I Loved Summer Camp until I taught a Canoeing Class from Hell" in Robot Butt
"First Kiss" in Issue II of Great Ape Journal
"Afraid of the Arch and Terrified by the Truss: My Fear of Bridges" in The Museum of Americana
"Why I love the Grocery Store" in Pif Magazine
"I Loved Summer Camp until I taught a Canoeing Class from Hell" in Robot Butt
Short Humor
"An Edited Commencement Speech for the Class of 2020" in McSweeney's
"Things you know about Kim Kardashian but not about your Dad" in The Belladonna
"30 Questions to Fall in Love" in 251
"Library Books to Hide from your Children" in 251
"This Word-of-the-Day App Chooses Vocabulary Specifically for You!" in The Weekly Humorist
"My Werewolf Erotica was Problematic, and I’d Like to Issue this Official Apology" in Slackjaw
"Why I Decided Not to Pluck my Chin Hair" in Slackjaw
"Smug Coworker Announces that he has Never Heard of the Kardashians" in Funny-ish
"Things you know about Kim Kardashian but not about your Dad" in The Belladonna
"30 Questions to Fall in Love" in 251
"Library Books to Hide from your Children" in 251
"This Word-of-the-Day App Chooses Vocabulary Specifically for You!" in The Weekly Humorist
"My Werewolf Erotica was Problematic, and I’d Like to Issue this Official Apology" in Slackjaw
"Why I Decided Not to Pluck my Chin Hair" in Slackjaw
"Smug Coworker Announces that he has Never Heard of the Kardashians" in Funny-ish
Fiction
"Prime Baby" in The Jokes Review
"Scooby Dooby Do, Where are you?" forthcoming in The Daily Drunk Magazine
"Scooby Dooby Do, Where are you?" forthcoming in The Daily Drunk Magazine